Love yourself and be loved by Joan Ørting

Author:Joan Ørting
Language: spa
Format: epub
Publisher: saxo
Published: 2017-11-15T00:00:00+00:00

The ‘What makes me happy’ exercise

We can start filling up our love tanks by doing a little exercise. Get a pen and paper and write out a list of 10-20 things that make you happy.

Hmm, what is it that makes me happy?

It could be a trip to the local swimming pool, tiding up your clothes and trying some of your old ones on, a walk in the woods, watching a whole season of your favorite TV series with wooly socks on your feet and a bowl of sweets by your side. You might enjoy creating small pottery figures, rearranging a room, sewing a bedspread, cooking a meal or baking a cake with the children. It might be a chat with your friends, or making a fuss of your cat. A horseback ride, singing in the shower or dancing in the middle of the living room floor. Yoga and stretching exercises work for everybody (at least afterwards). A kiss or two and a cuddle can also do wonders. Yes, there are many good things in life, we just need to remember to reach out and take them.

So write some wonderful things on your list.

Are you writing?

Sometimes it can be difficult to find 10-20 things if you’re not feeling especially happy at the moment. If so then try going back in time and remembering a time when you were really happy, and what you were doing then. What was it that made you happy then?

If you can’t bring that many words to mind, then it is extra important that you do find them.

That’s a sign that it’s time you allowed yourself to do anything you want to. If you have children, then teach them to take care of their own needs by letting them see you doing it. It’s a win-win situation. When you know what it is that makes you happy then you can do one or two of the things on your list every day. Carry on until you have learned the art of pleasing yourself.

It is important that you do something every day that makes you feel good, instead of just the things you feel you ought to do. When you take charge of your own happiness you will be filled up with the hormone Oxytocin, which is a wonderful ‘satisfaction’ hormone. It is released, for example, during foreplay with your partner, when you breastfeed your children or when you stroke your pets. We could also call it the ‘family hormone’ because it brings us closer together.

It is a very important hormone, especially for women, which is released the moment we do anything that gives us pleasure, but as soon as we come under pressure or become stressed then it is broken down by the stress hormone Cortisol. Without Oxytocin we become resentful when we see others relaxing or taking a break. We become distracted and run around doing little bits of this and that, but without commitment or any sense of involvement in what we are doing. When we are in this state we can’t seem to be able to sit down and rest.

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